Familiarity of A thousand laughs

 Deserter ! Runaway ! Absconder! Renegade! It is what you are right? You make your statements so inadvertently... What? You regret it? You will never hire me. You deserve to be maimed, your life shamed. Even so I could not stomach it. I needed you and you left me. Alone. I needed you then, I need you now, and for all eternity, even though you might not need me.(sniffs) You have finally presented yourself, my little lost soul. Was it fun? Without me? Did you miss me? Did you think of me? I doubt it. 

The world has been moving slower, maybe it's just me. One person had said that when you're in a hurry, it does exactly that. What am I in a hurry to do? To get to a place? A person? The veracity of this statement is slowly dawning on me. I've been dancing on my own, like a little Woodland fairy and I'm discovering that being alone does not necessarily mean being lonely. You are sorry? ( Scoffs) a piece of you will never be enough, just like half of me is not enough of me to give. I could never fight you, little soul. Only smother you with love, nothing less. However, not only did you drop the ball, you shit the bed too.

I spy with my little eye, as a gentle, electric tune plays in my mind.  You know the run- of- the- mill...Three things cannot long be hidden; and the truth is the last. I guess it is only fitting that you call me a daydreamer. (A step into the mind) ahh! This makes me remember that song, "Starlight and dew drops are waiting for thee, Sounds of the rude world heard in the day, Lull'd by the moonlight..." Yes. I know I'm not Stephen Foster and it's not 1862. Only that nostalgia can bring up so much... The truth that is true even for you is that all I can offer you is a sad welcome. Though sad, but a welcome nonetheless.

Welcome back to this temporary Haven, to this dark crevice where we hide so well, to this small shack that we call our own. To this place where I know you are free. To this Arboretum. To home. To me. Don't let me loose touch with the authentic essence of who I truly am. I don't want to be weak, I don't want to be empty, I don't want to be fatigued.

If you are a fool, then you are MY fool. Like children leaving a pleasant street at night, the desertion left me with lingering regret. It is good that we have touched base, otherwise...I don't want to think about otherwise. It only shows how asinine I am in reality. 

I thought I knew you. Your sadness, your dreams, your darkness, the ones you buried deep inside, your everything. You keep surprising me little soul, and I want to unravel you. To know what is in your very essence that makes you be my essence. To know what really makes you tick. A tick, another tick, maybe a rock, then finally a boom! Haaaa! Maybe you'll tell me of your adventures without me, and what finally made you return. A sad welcome it is, for I am broken to a million little pieces. I have tried to piece myself back together but I can't. I need you little soul, I need you. Only a redamancy can save me, one that comes with the familiarity of a thousand cheers, a thousand tears, a thousand laughs and a thousand years and a thousand lives and deaths.

I talked with Learttes. Don't be jealous. It does not suit you. The only blossom that is left is Rue. And it is the only one I would have given you if I had the rest. Here, Rue, for your regrets. The distress of mind will haunt you, but you don't have a mind do you? There's this sinking feeling in my chest. The Long night is coming, along with winter; My Little lost soul, and I am the Night's Watch.

All you can do is sit back for the ride,for only the fire can save you. And I have plenty in stock.

As will always be a pleasure,

Asari Sango.